It can be hard to talk about sexual difficulties, even with our partners, and yet many of us go through periods when our sex lives are much less enjoyable than they could be. If we find we can’t solve these difficulties on our own, they may start to affect the quality of our relationships, and this can cause a great deal of worry and unhappiness.

Sexual problems may have many causes, including physical (e.g. as a result of illness, disability or medications), psychological, emotional or circumstantial. Most often they arise from a combination of these factors.

Psychosexual therapy offers a safe space to explore and understand what is going wrong, and to discuss a range of treatment options. It can also be a good place to work on other difficulties in your relationship, such as poor communication or problems around life changes.

If you have a partner, it’s ideal if you can both attend sessions together, because sexual and relationship difficulties rarely (if ever) “belong” to one partner or the other. If you don’t have a sexual partner or s/he is not willing to attend, you are welcome to come to sessions on you own.

These are just some of the reasons people come for psychosexual therapy:

Are you finding you no longer seem to desire sex, even though you might sometimes ‘want to want’ it?

Do you have problems getting aroused? For men, this may mean problems getting or maintaining an erection; for women, a lack of physical enjoyment or lubrication.

Do you find it difficult to reach orgasm?

Do you ejaculate before you want to, leaving you and/or your partner dissatisfied?

Do you find penetration painful or impossible?

Are there issues from your past which are stopping you from being able to enjoy sexual relationships in the present, such as sexual trauma or negative childhood messages about sex?

The first couple of sessions will involve taking a detailed history of the problem. We will then discuss whether psychosexual therapy with me seems like a good option for you at this time. If not, I will usually be able to suggest other avenues for you to try.

Often in the course of therapy some simple exercises are recommended for you to practice in privacy at home (never during the therapy session). I may also recommend books or videos for you to try.

I work with anyone aged 18 upwards: gay/lesbian, straight or bisexual; sexually experienced or virgin; single, in open or exclusive relationships.

My fee for psychosexual therapy (both assessments and ongoing sessions) is £60 for couples and £40 for individuals. Sometimes I can offer concessions where this is difficult to afford – please feel free to ask if this is the case.

If you would like to arrange an initial assessment to see if sexual and relationship therapy might be a way forward for you, please give me a call on 07940 526664 or send an e-mail to rose@whiteleywords.com